August 09, 2006

Halloumi and Sympathy


Typical! Bloody typical! Every time we come up with an original idea everybody and his bloody dog is out there ready to pilfer and take credit.

What business does tha Arab League have in interfering with the Lebanon thingy? They think they're so clever. And how clever would you be if the likes of Georges Lillique did not make the mistake of proposing peace plans in public? Answer me that, ya bunch of thieveing sheiks, dancing around in slow motion in your gallabias? Get a bloody job!

And the French? What's their connection to the region? Can't they just stay put at the Georges Pompidou Air Force Base and Culinary Institute outside Paphos?

And speaking of culinary - how did the Culinary Institute of America get to become so influential in the world of intelligence and espionage? Damned imperialist sous-chefs!!

And on top of it all even Pashardis' brilliant idea of sending in Cypriot peacekeepers has become a 'source of inspiration' among such low-life creep nations as France and Turkey. What in hell is going on here?

Cyprus earmarks Private Costis and Lance Corporal Yiannis to go to Lebanon and spread some peace and suddenly everyone jumps on our bloody bandwagon.

And the idea of the Cyprus troops was, to say the least, a stroke of genius - especially as it came hot on the heels of a rumour that the Danish Dairy Board has purchased the halloumi.com Domain Name for an undisclosed amount.

The idea was to send Costis and Yiannis (the most famous duo since Abercrombie and Fitch - alleged inventors of the mechanical pencil) with a small 'foukou' and a tub of traditional village halloumi. As they'd be the first peacekeepers on the scene, the world's press would flock and start snapetty snapping away. Doctored images galore would then spread like wildfire all over the internation media.

The world would witnes our pallikaria grilling up slice upon glorious slice of pure Cyprus Comfort and handing this unique cheese to the disposessed and shell-shocked victims of the Lebanese crisis. We'd be the good guys and get a ton of free marketing for our prized export to boot.

I can only urge our authorities and celebrity ministers to keep things quiet. Plagiarism is rife in the wicked, smelly world of international diplomacy.

In the afterlife we'll all be getting free halloumi
- Joe Strummer

4 Comments:

Blogger drakouna said...

Oh! I came for a round(ένα γυρό) to your blog and me like very much.
Tomorrow να γράψεις about kapparin, another meze who goes with everything.

Drakouna- proud citizen of stravaraland!

09 August, 2006 10:36  
Blogger Noullis said...

Na'sai kala Drakouna mas!

Kappari...hmm, with a bit of butter, olive oil and lemon zest. Once the spaghetti is almost done it goes straight into the frying pan for a minute or more. The maidanique is proeretique if one decides to put skortous into the whole mix.

09 August, 2006 10:50  
Blogger Giorgio said...

Koumpare Noulln,
Nakko xalloumoudiv, vakkov kappariv pou lalei tze n koumera n Drakouna tze llio koviakkoudiv tze ava88emav tov pou xrosti tze poshi va pierosei...
Xate sire tze eva pastourma pasta karbouva va toumaviasn o topos tze efiamev...

09 August, 2006 20:37  
Blogger Noullis said...

Liberal translation of comrade Giorgio's commentary:

"A bit of halloumi and some capers - as suggested by the-witness-to-a-wedding, Drakouna - and a bit of [local] brandy."

"Who, after all, should care whether he [or she] may be in debt. And some of us may be even misbehaved enough not to take our financial obligatios seriously [of course, Giorgio says so in pure Mediterranean jest - I say this in case he is finacially burdened and on the off chance that bank employees have recently learned to read!]"

"And, [while we're at it] why not some spicey local sausage type sausage. Enough so a to crate a cloud of cover, under which we can slip away."

Forever the poet, I raise my glass to Giorgio's good health.

10 August, 2006 12:07  

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