Halloumi Habibi!

Following on the success of Stravaraland's potato exports via the northern section of our geographical location, our Agriculture Minister (and accomplished vegetable detective) has been talking to people in Larnaca about the prospects of dairy exports to the Middle East.

According to the Republix' Haber agency, there are good prospects of increasing exports despite the promotion of dairy products by other countries countries such as Lebanon and Turkey.

Koumpare Photi, you are totally confusing us now. Besides being unable to tell the difference between north and south-bound traffic on the island, are you now trying to place Stravaraland in the Middle East and Asia? What were you drinking with those Larnaca dairy producers?

It seems, according to the same news report, that Photis Photis also has a cunning plan (no, it doesn't involve a giant turnip) to fend off competition from these neighbouring countries by ... registering Halloumi as a trademark in the Middle East!

I ask once more whether the trademarking will also include the term Hellim? Does the said pseudo-geo cheese come from what was once Cyprus or not? Will the Norwegians be successful in promoting their own halloumi in the Middle East? Did Photis tell the Larnaca Chamber of Commerce about the impending changes in EU CAP subsidies or did he not get the memo?