PseudoGeography or a Slip of the Tongue?

We were so eagerly awaiting Kofi Annan's departure from the U.N. so that the Cyprus Problem could be solved according to our wishes and expectations. And what do we get in return? Before the cuckoo flew over the nest, before the rooster crowed three times, before the geographical term "Northern Cyprus" sank in, we got a new Sec. Gen. telling us that there should be negotiations between the two states in Cyprus.

What? Is he also referring to geographical locations, or is he simply another bloody traitor? Here we have a bit of a problem, though, as a traitor has to come from within. Well, maybe not in this case, seeing as he is a traitor to international law and order as well as to European ideals: yes, the ones we gave to the rest of the world as a gift a mere 2,500 years ago.

Mr Ban - or Moon, as that hideous peasant Zkoullias will probably refer to him (only to get the opportunity to give him a rude little Cypriot nickname) - is simply the archetype of a New Traitor on the block! He should apologise immediately before any of our political leaders agree to talk with any U.N. diplomat. Ever!

As traitors of ideals, betrayors of our people's inalienable human rights, such men cannot be tolerated. We will ignore them unless they beg for mercy, unless they go to Ledra Palace and publicly admit that this was a horrible slip of the tongue. In this case, when it comes to such an important topic and a key component of our struggle (winning over the independent U.N.), we are not willing to accept the geographical term.

We need a few more decades to accept that from the U.N. itself, but, for the time being, we will not compromise. With every microgramme of our mental ability, with every angelic vocal chord we have, with all the potatoes that cannot be exported, we will fight, we will shout, we will throw those potatoes at them if they so much as even think of talking to us. There is nothing to talk about before the necessary preparations can be made.

Victory is within our grasp. Give us 5 more years (that naive Glafcos thought he could do it in 16 months...) and we will triumphantly enter Kyrenia! With our banks fully under our control, with our superior economy, we will unite the two states and create the loving relationship we once had with our T/C brothers. Who just don't realize how much we love them, how much we want them to be part of the Republic as they pretend not to bother, like a bride holding out for a bigger dowry. We will persist, and we will win. 5 more years is what we need, 5 more years to shove our winning strategy down the throats of all those colonial-serving, dog-eating U.N. diplomats!

Choose Life!!!

originally posted by Apodimos Kypreos