Computer Says 'No'

Yeah, OK, I thought, might as well sign up for the American Express Cyprus Airways Sunmiles card. Hey, it was a half price offer and I might even fly our national carrier if I'm feeling prankish and adventurous.

So, I go to the airline's website to register. Wait a minute - ah, yes - says here enter your Sunmiles number on the back of the plastic and enter your last name in the box below. Nothing, nada, eshei angourin.

Am I having a Woody Allenesque existential moment (who once wrote that the closest he ever came to death was when an eagle swooped down and flew off with his passport - I paraphrase and digress)?

Let me call their Customer Center.

Me: Hi, I'm having trouble registering using my Sunmiles AMEX code.
CC: Sorry, but you haven't got a PIN
Me: But I'm trying to register....
CC: Well, try again in a week or so...
Me: What do you mean try in a week or so - don't you have my information?
CC: No
Me: So, when will I get one?
CC: I don't know - these things take time - depending on our workload... it could take a week, it could take 2 months....
Me: Well, can you give me an indication as to how long it'll take to process
CC: No....
Me: OK, are you going to notify me at any stage in time?
CC: No...

This is great. The Bank of Cyprus convinced me it was a good idea to get the card. I use it and am under the impression I'm totting up points that'll go towards the next trip I take. Eshei angouri - there is cucumber. Oh, I forgot to ask whether the PIN would be the same as the one on the card. I doubt if they'd know.

I then had a great business idea: a taxi service with an unlisted 'phone number!